Month Gone

31st January 2014
I am going to be glad to see the back of January. It has been a tough time the last few months, well, the last 18 months really since Mum's cancer came back. I am still absolutely devastated at her passing, naturally, but given how much she was suffering perhaps it is better for her to have gone.

It still leaves a massive chasm in all of our lives though.

I am still having those moments where I think of something to tell her, ask her, show her... or just drive through the village expecting to see her toddling down to the Post Office as she often would. Although probably not for the last few months.

There are memories everywhere. Both in Storth and here in Ulverston. I am not sure how to come to terms with them, at the moment every fibre of my body wants to go somewhere else where I am not so acutely aware of her no longer being there. Somewhere I don't have such strong memories of her being present perhaps?

There is time enough for that though. We still have tough times ahead of us, and need to plan for the future on a very basic level first before worrying about them more complex things. However we are already thinking of setting up all sorts of adventures for the rest of this year to keep ourselves busy, give ourselves something to look forward too in the near future and provide a coping strategy.

For now though - a photo of Ed the Cat.

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